By Shannon Williams
I recall when I would use the term “Sandwich Generation” meaning that you have parents and children and try to juggle them and their needs. I guess I am now a triple decker sandwich, as I am very blessed to have a living parent, grown children and grandchildren. When friends call, we go through all three, “how’s your mom, how is Evan and Paul’s Children, how are the grandkids”. I find myself using the term “circle of life” a lot these days.
Back in the day, friends gathered around while someone played an acoustic guitar and we all sang along. One of my very favorites was “The Circle Game” by Joni Mitchell. I would love it when my sweet friend, Paula (and Godmother to my son) would play that and we would all sing along. I am not sure what about the lyrics spoke to me at that time in my life, so I went back and listened to it again today, as I was thinking about what to write about.
And the painted ponies go up and down
We’re captive on the carousel of time
We can’t return, we can only look
Behind from where we came
And go round and round and round in the circle game”
My son, is finishing up his teachers’ certificate and having to do all the paperwork that the state of California requires, he tells me it just does not make sense what they want and how they ask for it. I provided encouragement and support and we talked of how fast this would be over. Watching your children become adults and support them as they deal with adult troubles and life’s drama can be heartbreaking, but when they make it through that struggle, you know that they have learned and thus will be able to handle the next one that comes their way.
We kept 2 of the 3 grandsons this weekend, watching our young grandchildren learn to speak and express themselves is just pure joy, just as hearing a 3-month-old laughing. It is one of the things that just gets sweeter as you grow old. Having long talks about life with the 8-year-old as he begins to discover so much about himself and builds the skills he needs in life. We took the 8-year-old and the 2-year-old back to the petting zoo and to the Candy store while they were here. Watching how each one approached the animals and fed them was just too much fun. We went back and got carrots several times as we were all having fun feeding all of the pigs, and goats, the little horse and many more. Both really loved the chickens and roosters and other assorted fowls and they were neat to watch. At the candy store, the two-year-old only wanted blue candy! The eight-year-old wanted it all and not sure who got more candy, him or my husband!
Watching my 95-year-old mother at the end of her life is just painful, no way around it. She is just so tired of all the medical care and I know as her mind fills with the strange thoughts from dementia, you can see fear in her eyes. She was “released “(kicked out) of rehab this week, as they did not think she was making enough progress. We had not set our hopes to high, we wanted to give rehab a try (and so did she) to see if we could prevent her being in the bed all of the time. The goal was to get her strong enough that it would be easier for her to be transferred, so she could sit in her favorite chair and watch her birds and get a real shower. She let us know she had enough of being told what to do and was ready to have some peace, so we moved her back to her little home, with all the supports, hoping that she will find some peace there. My mother sat with me for over 10 days when I was in the hospital while pregnant with my son, I had already had 3 miscarriages and when I started to have problems, we took no chances and off to the hospital I went. She was such a comfort to me, I was a mess, so worried I would miscarry again, she just comforted me and let me feel all of the emotions I was feeling. I hope she understands that we are just trying to do the same for her and I pray that she finds comfort with her children at this time in her life.
In my high school days, the marching band helped with a traveling carnival to raise money. I signed up to dress up like a clown and help little kids on the rides. One the carnival workers taught me how to walk on the carousal as it went around and round. I am using that skill today as I ride the Carousel of time and my life along with those who are part of it. I try to be very grateful that I have all of these people in my life and that they allow me to be part of their life and their carousel of life. Life truly does go around and around, and you cannot get off, but as with the Carousel, there is fun to be had.
I have attached, the standard West Texas Grandmother photo of grandchildren in the bluebonnets, I am thrilled that I can get them to grown down on the gulf coast, brings a little bit of West Texas to the beach.
[SW: Mar-12-2024]
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